Your pain can be your greatest teacher if you’re willing to listen.
Emotional pain has a way of changing us. Whether it’s heartbreak, loss, or a life event that shakes us to our core, we all carry those experiences with us. In this video, I reflect on how emotional pain can transform us…
Is emotional pain changing you? You know, when the weight of a broken heart crushes you, leaving you gasping for air… When the world spins on, seemingly uncaring… When the pain feels like it’ll swallow you whole… Can you even imagine a way out? Is it possible to find something meaningful in the rubble? There has to be a way to find strength you never thought possible, right?
“How much more can I take? How much pain can one heart hold?” There was a time I stood in front of a mirror, barely able to breathe under the weight of a broken heart, and asked myself those very questions; a while ago… I even wrote a poem about it, you know. It’s in my book.
And yes, there is so much advice floating out there on how to deal with emotional pain, and that’s all fine. But tell me, how do you really deal with the overwhelming emotional pain that comes with loss, with heartbreak? When in the midst of it, you wonder if it’s even possible to find relief, to truly heal from emotional pain, and to move forward. You know that emotional pain can be devastating…
Life has this way of throwing curveballs, gut punches…the kind of emotional pain that feels like it’ll never let up. But what’s astounding to me is not the pain itself… it’s what we do with it, you know… It’s this incredible thing about the human heart… It’s how much we can hold, how we process the pain, and how we get back up. Do you think that emotional pain… it has a purpose? Because we all know it, don’t we? It’s as human as breathing. The sting of rejection, the hollowness of loss, or the harsh slap of failed dreams—it all sinks down into the heart, finding a home there.
Our hearts, you know, they’re where we hold our love and our pain. But sometimes…sometimes, that pain feels so heavy, so overwhelming. Like we can’t carry it anymore. Yet we do. Do you know why? Because we’re not built with a limited capacity for pain. We’re not cups that spill over when we’ve had too much. Our hearts, they adapt. Every sigh of disappointment, every tear we try to hide – they don’t crack the heart. They broaden it, enlarging its ability to hold and heal. Our hearts are more like a lake, depth unknown, expanding with every ripple of hardship… But more than that… they’re the place where, within each heartbeat, we find the strength to understand that every stumble, every fall, doesn’t spell the end. It’s just a different beginning, a chance to pick ourselves up, dust off, and start anew, fortified by the experiences that brought us to our knees.
The other day, I talked to my friend about life and pain… He told me that the pain made him hard, toughened him up. I hear it. I totally get it. It’s interesting how it can appear this way. I heard these comments being thrown my way as well. Like “You are a tough bird,” or “You’re so strong.”, you know. Yes, in my life, I had my fair share of emotional and physical turmoil. But hearing them say, ‘You’re so strong,’ stung a little. It made me question if resilience meant becoming…hard?
And then I thought: “But that’s not what has to happen, is it?” We don’t have to turn into stones. Instead, we might soften. A soft heart isn’t a weak heart… It’s an open heart… you know, like a blossom… delicate yet receptive to the world around it… And just like that, we might open up… open up to other human experiences and their pain.
Because as we experience our own pain, we start to feel for others, you know? We recognize shared humanity in their eyes. And our hearts… they learn the language of empathy, of understanding. We might even start to see ourselves reflected in the experiences of others. That’s resilience; that’s real strength, isn’t it? It’s transforming not despite pain but because of it.
But think about this… even in pain, there’s love.
Love and hope, they’re always there with us, even during our hardest times. They weave through our stories, adding color to our existence. Even in the midst of throbbing pain, the heart remembers to love, to hope. It knows that without darkness, there is no light.
What makes us strong isn’t that we don’t feel pain. It’s that we feel it, acknowledge it, and when we cry out, “How much can one heart take?” – it’s in that moment, in that question, that we can tap into something no less than divine. It’s the kind of courage that has seen us through centuries, through wars and famines, losses and wins. It’s the strength of humanity, the strength of a boundless heart.
So, life will throw its punches, and we’ll feel the pain. But the thing is, the heart takes it, holds it, learns from it, and transforms it.
So, how much pain can one heart take? The answer is not a measure, but a promise—a promise of enduring, of growing, of loving. Because hearts, they’re made to beat and to brave, they’re made to bear and to hold, and above all, they’re made to love.”
do not regurgitate that.
Be Alive 🌱
Love ❤️, Julia
We’re in this together—every step, every breath, every heartbeat.
Healing through Loss
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