Embracing self-love and choosing compassion is the key to unlocking our true potential and creating a positive impact on the world. Often, our inner critic keeps us from reaching our goals and living out our dreams. It takes time, effort, and patience to change our perspective from judgment to compassion. The impact of self-love extends beyond ourselves and inspires others to do the same, creating a ripple effect that can change the world.

Beyond the Gaze

Beyond the Gaze

What I feel isn’t important
What I think isn’t special either
What I do for a living, no one can notice
As to my looks…
I don’t want to even glance in the mirror…
As a mother and partner I’m failing completely
The sink-filled with dishes, the cooktop is filthy
I don’t respect other people’s opinions
I’m socially awkward, a useless weirdo…

I look at myself through the eyes of the stranger
a mean and annoyed one who’s bothered by life
Feeling wounded and small
all I can is to cry as I’m slipping down and away
From under the squint of those judging eyes

In those eyes, I’m ugly and fat
In those eyes, I am just wasteful full
In those eyes, I’m just a waste of space
Unworthy of love impostor with no grace

So, here, I’m trying again…

What I do for a living is decent
But it’s not enough, I must excel
As a woman, I have to do better
And in business, I need to up my game
There’s so much room for improvement
And I have only myself to blame

I need to fix my life, face, and space
So everything falls in its proper place
All bins in the pantry should always sit straight
The rose on the counter should never faint
So I can make every minute count
Have everything in a proper amount

I must meditate, journal, look great, never age,
Bake, bike, take cold showers, always engage,
And get up no later than five without fail
To live a life of perceived success and leave no trail

Be social, cook, do yoga, and volunteer,
And hit the gym to keep my body in gear
But with the structure so rigid
My focus keeps fleeting
But talking to me’s quite pleasing
If I keep all my tricks repeating

As I look at myself with coaching eyes
The drill sergeant’s gaze that enforces a fight
To chase elusive goals that were never mine
Chasing the tail of an illusion I can’t even define

In these eyes, there’s a guiding direction
In these eyes, there’re rigid rules
In these eyes, there’s a solution to all
And recipes for success on how to please the rest…
You can climb to the top and reside
But your soul can’t soar flying high while you strive

So I’m trying again…

I am both exciting and easy to be with
My soul runs deep like the ocean, ever spacious and breezy
Creativity flows through me, timeless and priceless indeed
And my arms are graced with the elegance of a swan’s wings
Through the sparkle in my eyes, you can get in to see and feel
The warmth and softness of my heart’s cozy light deep within

My legs are lovely, and my cute feet are perfect
to twirl me around in the joyful dance
My wild sun-kissed hair dazzles
with the vibrant hues of an endless summer
as a mischievous breeze caresses each strand
with a warm embrace

And to hell with the norms, rigid rules, and do-gooder’s restraints
My passion and energy gushes, not caring for norms
bursting with power and strength
I’m the best I know how to be daughter, sister, and mother
and the most tender lover and friend I can see

And I sing like a stream flowing into the powerful sound of a river
and I twinkle like bright stars in the infinite sky
Drown in close by the tender smile
I got lost in deep wonder of eyes…

And I gaze at myself with these eyes
With your adoring, caring, loving, kind eyes…
And my emotions soar and overflow
they pour out as tears
and I let them flow
washing away any doubt and fears 
bringing acceptance and peace
as my vision clears

In these eyes, I’m just right
In these eyes, I’m a precious soul and a joyful being
In these eyes, I’m a bright shining light
And so it shall be, set me free, let me be

Through different eyes we’re being watched
As creators, children, coaches, and mothers
Each eye with its own expectations
Dictating how we should see ourselves in reflection

But we need not be held captive to their gaze
Nor let their standards guide our days
See through the lens of loving-kindness, clear and pure
Embrace the unique beauty that is only yours

With compassion and care you can try
see yourself through your eyes and my eyes
and you might be surprised what you find
in those loving eyes…
In these eyes, you’re a precious gem
In these eyes, you sparkle with life and love as you are divine
In these eyes, you’re complete and more than enough

So embrace yourself with “good morning” to start your day
And “good night” as the stars come to play
Admit that you are wonderful, worthy, and whole
Love yourself fully, body, mind, and soul

For in these eyes, there is no judgment or hate
Only acceptance, grace, and peace that resonate
With every beat of your heart, every breath you take
Embrace your beauty, your strength, your unique soul’s shape

So see yourself with love, compassion, and care
With eyes that honor the journey and where
You’ve come from and where you’re going next
With the courage to love yourself and all life’s complex

May these eyes be the ones that you choose
To see yourself in a light that is true
And may they guide you on this journey of life
To shine your brightest and embrace your own light

(2017 © Julia Delaney)


Julia Delaney

A Gentle Outlook: Embracing Self-Love and Choosing Compassion

As I navigate through the ups and downs of life, I often find myself struggling to meet the demands and expectations placed upon me. The world can feel like a harsh and unforgiving place, and it’s easy to lose sight of what truly matters amidst the chaos – self-love.

I’ve come to realize that we are all imperfect beings with our own unique flaws and shortcomings. Yet, we tend to judge ourselves and others harshly, focusing on what’s wrong instead of what’s right. We let our inner critic hold us back from achieving our goals and fulfilling our dreams, forgetting that self-love, self-compassion, and self-acceptance are the keys to unlocking our true potential.

But what does it mean to truly love ourselves? It’s not just about accepting our flaws and shortcomings but also about treating ourselves with kindness and compassion. It’s about acknowledging our strengths and unique qualities and allowing ourselves to grow and thrive.

As I began to embrace self-love, I realized that it’s a journey – one that requires time, effort, and patience. It’s not always easy to shift our perspective from judgment to compassion, but the rewards are transformative.

When we choose to look at ourselves and others with loving eyes, we create a space for growth and creativity. We allow ourselves and others to be the best versions of themselves, to embrace their unique qualities and talents, and to strive for excellence without fear of failure or rejection.

And the impact of self-love goes beyond ourselves. By treating ourselves with kindness and acceptance, we create a positive energy that spreads to those around us. We inspire others to do the same, creating a ripple effect that can change the world.

Of course, there are times when our inner critic can be relentless, and it takes resilience and determination to continue on this journey. But by choosing to embrace self-love, we can transform ourselves and the world around us.

Exploration of self-love to see the beauty in imperfection and the potential in every person we meet can be very transformative. Let us be kind and compassionate to ourselves and in doing so, inspire others to do the same. Together, we can create a world that is filled with love, acceptance, and kindness – one loving step at a time.

LOVING-KINDNESS PRACTICE

 

Be Alive 🌱
Love ❤️, Julia

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